Going to Bed with a Stranger

As soon as I heard this sermon, I knew for sure that this was telepathy. If there is anything am drawn to in this life, it is the desire and pleasure of communicating with metaphors; life itself is one massive metaphor you have to agree with me. Every time I come to an 'aha' life moment, life only gets better. My kid sister, Phoebe, likes to confess,  'Life can only get better from this point on.’

As I said yesterday, the cancer in me is fueled by emotions and I guess just being me am prone to day dreaming and creating a future that I want to live.  Well, being on this road includes advisers, friends (non-haters of course), endless thinking, analysis and decision making; however sometimes I just want to plunge in. The thinker in me won’t let me.  I just had a flashback, as Kim says while twirling her finger, 'wait for this!'  three weeks ago, I had gone to Universadade Federal da Bahia to get work done, as I waited for the bus several people walked up to me and asked me in Portuguese whether buses to Praca da se stopped there, I replied in the pequeno Portuguese that I knew that yes they did, and of course they assumed I was Brazilian. After about 30mins I got tired of waiting and I decided to sit by the road, cross legged, I did what people do, or maybe  what made me look so at home. I remember feeling so warm and at peace with myself, as if I was at home and that is the day I knew for sure that I wanted to live in Brazil. The move may not be easy, it may be complicated, and it may happen it may not, yet right now at this moment I know it is what I want. 

This morning T.D. Jakes has been talking about becoming intimately involved with what one has been dreaming about for too long, take the risk and live life. He talks about the need we have of wanting to be legitimized and it is in this new move of becoming intimate with what was just an idea, going to bed with one’s dreams that will bring legitimacy to our lives.  Like he says, I have to stop listening to what I have consumed and start finding out where the equipment’s are to make my dreams come true. The encouragement to make myself available to opportunity, will allow opportunity to cover me with its skirt. Opportunity cannot  cover you if you aren’t there; I have to make myself  visible  to living  where I want to live and invisible  to where I came from- the two cannot function together.  So here I am getting ready to go to bed with the strangest dreams I have ever had!

Safety & security for me are such key elements to living, I want to birth in a safe, healthy and beautiful place, whether it be dreams, children and hopes. Am also reminded that Lions never birth where there is traffic, or confusion, they often move to a place of safety, Lambs do the same; maybe it is why Kimara had to be born where there is love and security- kudos to his mother! 

Am sure you may have guessed that this sermon comes from the book of Ruth in the Bible that ends in Baby talk, she on her second marriage to Boaz is finally healthy enough to reproduce and God says to her (not literally), “Now am going to let you do what you could not do before, what you failed at and could not get to happen and you were angry at me that I could not let it happen. You thought I said no, but I said later. Now am going to do what you have been dreaming of as you are far  enough in the process of growth to let it happen. Now you have cleaned up, you know who you are, you know who I am and now you are going to birth it from a different place. You have your strength back, you can spot a phony, you can spot a  jigalo, you can tell when your girlfriend is a hater and now that you are in a healthy place you are going to do it and if you have the courage to try what you failed at, I am going to make it happen for you.”